Mary Jane's Shoes

Mary Jane's Shoes

Musings of one person among many. Not exceptional in any way, as with all, I have exceptional experiences and varied reactions to those events. Mine is one of many life stories and how I manage and cope with the events which make my life my own, I attempt to put forth by way of my writings.

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Laughter and Lace

June 23, 2014


How do you move when your heart is close to still?
How do you bring back the effervescent thrill?
How, when the hurt nearly stops flowing blood?
How can you end the tearful growing flood?


In the window’s reflection, I caught a smile upon my face.
Not only lips turned up, I did catch a view of lace.
Delicate and white, it graced my shoulder’s form.
Laughing eyes and lace exposed as lightning struck in storm.


Laughter and lace, along with the tears,
built a lovely strength not felt for years.
Hold grins, visions and bits of lace,
~ the beauty of each will replace the tearful flood.
~ the nature of each will return the flow of blood.

Happy Place

May 27, 2014 1 Comment


I miss so many. Why can’t all the people I love, for whom I care, and want to keep near actually be in close proximity to me? This wish is selfish and not practical I am aware; I still wish it to be true.

My mind vacations in an exceptional place, one where all I love are together. It might be we are on a beach, in an art museum, or in a worn, well loved home with wild English garden vines and flowers covering much of its stone. Music and laughter are continuous and omnipresent. Not one person thinks of a time for the gathering to end. There is no thought of goodbyes.

I wish goodbyes to be none existent. I wish laughing to be a language in and if itself.

When I close my eyes for the last time, I wish to be mid-laugh.

Until that day, some time will be spent in my mind’s vacation place, visiting the language of laughter.


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A One Day Selfish Bucket List

December 7, 2009 2 Comments

Living one day that could be sublime in all ways, perfect, although nothing is so, is a thought recently very much on my mind.  There exist too many choices; if I had the privilege of making such decisions it would be difficult. In which activities would I take part if only given one perfect day?  With whom would I surround myself?  In what place would I spend my time?  Again, too many choices.  So, I have decided on your basic average magical day, a day where anything can take place.  My definition of this is a day that would be longer than the 24 hour rotation of this world in respect to the sun. The axis would spin more slowly. As well, I would be able to handle an extremely lengthy time period without sleep.  This magical day could include the outrageous, such as meeting and personally learning from the likes of Stephen Hawkings, Lincoln, Rembrandt, Faulkner and Ansel Adams and Bernini.  Books would line the walls of nearly every room. If one were missing, it would appear. This is an unavailable set of circumstances, but I AM speaking of a type of voodoo here.

The man I have spent the last 31 years loving would without question be by my side. My children and their significant others, my parents and siblings, extended family and true friends would all be a part of this unique and extraordinary day.  (Well, it would be an extraordinarily special day to me, if to no one else.)  Each member of the entire clan and all the calabash cousins would find themselves laughing at someone’s comments or antics throughout this time.  All would indulge in deep, hearty laughs that reveal an intense happiness which resides beneath the reaction to the jokes and escapades. (By the way, when I leave this place I want all to celebrate, to laugh.  Those that show up are to be in brightly colored clothing.  Maybe a second line parade.)

Music.  Music would be omnipresent.  Music would be in walking surround sound, be everywhere, as theme music in a movie.   It would automatically change depending on the mood of the moment.  Miles Davis, Louis Armstrong, The Beatles, George Harrison, David Koz, Paul Sanchez, and Eric Clapton would be represented. B.B. King, Van Morrison, Frank Sinatra and Irma Thomas, their voices would fill the air. Allison Krauss, Ingrid Michelson and of course some Hawaiian music would waft between the leaves.  Johnny Cash, Patsy Kline and Luciano Pavarotti would stream from the rivers. The list will not end so I will stop trying to run through it all.  Apologies.

Those that would be so inclined would burst into song and/or “bust a move” when the spirit moved them to let go. I would be very much in that company. It would be a “day” that would saturate the senses.

My hands would hold a manual camera, or two, heavy, sturdy with great presence. My fingers would press the cool shutter release and the lighting would always be correct for whatever effect I would be trying to achieve.

Where to spend this longer than twenty-four hour day?  My initial choice has to be on the Tuscany and Amalfi coasts of Italy, where mountains are visible from the shore of the Mediterranean and cliffs drop into the sea.  Speaking Italian fluently, yes that would be a must.  French too. Wait a minute… there still exist the islands of Hawaii,  the landscape is also one of mountain ranges and sea together.  Strong floral scents, large, tropical leaves and getting dirty hiking to waterfalls, all of these could be experienced before jumping in the pools at the falls’ bases. Can I mix this with incredible Italian food, New Orleans’ cuisine and a visit to Firenze’s Uffizi Gallery?  Drop in on Jackson Pollock painting and Degas during the time he lived in New Orleans? Throw in horseback riding along the shore, in Italy or Hawaii.

If it is my one-of-a-kind, magical day, I suppose I can dream as I please.  Sometimes dreams do come true.  Granted I have pushed an impossible set of circumstances into a day.  Well, in my day of hocus-pocus, it would not be impossible.

Oh yes, I would want to zip down to Peru and the Andes, Brazil’s Amazon and Kenya.  A flight into Bhutan, home of the happiest people on earth, would be part of the finale. I would listen to local traditional music and wear traditional clothing from everywhere I travel. Do you think my entire family and my friends would go for all of this?  I guess I would need  to convince my fear of flying to hibernate as well as convince my loved ones to accompany me. The latter wouldn’t be too difficult.

This perfect day has evolved into a selfish bucket list.  I would witness and be a part of many hugs and much hand-holding.  No loved one would feel even a short moment of loneliness. Once again, I will reiterate that laughter and MUSIC would fill nearly every moment. (On some occasions I would want moments where the only sounds I hear would be the simple, yet complex, earth-born utterances which put my mind at ease.)

My selfish dream day.  I have been fortunate to have experienced some entries on my list.  Some I will most likely not, and definitely not with all those I love.  I will keep an open heart and willing mind in any regard.  Who knows?  Maybe I will pick up the violin again.

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