Mary Jane's Shoes

Mary Jane's Shoes

Musings of one person among many. Not exceptional in any way, as with all, I have exceptional experiences and varied reactions to those events. Mine is one of many life stories and how I manage and cope with the events which make my life my own, I attempt to put forth by way of my writings.

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Laughter and Lace

June 23, 2014

~

How do you move when your heart is close to still?
How do you bring back the effervescent thrill?
How, when the hurt nearly stops flowing blood?
How can you end the tearful growing flood?

~

In the window’s reflection, I caught a smile upon my face.
Not only lips turned up, I did catch a view of lace.
Delicate and white, it graced my shoulder’s form.
Laughing eyes and lace exposed as lightning struck in storm.

~

Laughter and lace, along with the tears,
built a lovely strength not felt for years.
Hold grins, visions and bits of lace,
~ the beauty of each will replace the tearful flood.
~ the nature of each will return the flow of blood.

Happy Place

May 27, 2014 1 Comment

~

I miss so many. Why can’t all the people I love, for whom I care, and want to keep near actually be in close proximity to me? This wish is selfish and not practical I am aware; I still wish it to be true.

My mind vacations in an exceptional place, one where all I love are together. It might be we are on a beach, in an art museum, or in a worn, well loved home with wild English garden vines and flowers covering much of its stone. Music and laughter are continuous and omnipresent. Not one person thinks of a time for the gathering to end. There is no thought of goodbyes.

I wish goodbyes to be none existent. I wish laughing to be a language in and if itself.

When I close my eyes for the last time, I wish to be mid-laugh.

Until that day, some time will be spent in my mind’s vacation place, visiting the language of laughter.

~

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A One Day Selfish Bucket List

December 7, 2009 2 Comments

Living one day that could be sublime in all ways, perfect, although nothing is so, is a thought recently very much on my mind. Aging does lend itself to review, a review of experiences had or not. It leads one to reevaluate. It demands thoughts of what one wants to do with the remaining hours, days, one hopes to be gifted, but, there exist too many choices. If I had the privilege of making such decisions it would be difficult. In which activities would I take part if only given one perfect day?  With whom would I surround myself?  In what place would I spend my one perfect day. Too many choices.  As this is the case, I have decided to push the boundaries of my basic, average, magical day. It shall be a day where anything can take place. 

My definition of this begins with time allotted. A 24-hour day doesn’t cut it. This perfect day would be a day that would be longer than the 24-hour rotation of this world in respect to the sun. The earth would spin more slowly on its axis. As well, I would be able to handle an extremely lengthy time period without sleep. 

This magical day would include the outrageous, such as meeting and personally learning from the likes of Stephen Hawking, Lincoln, Vermeer and Picasso, Twain, Emerson and Thoreau, Ansel Adams and Bernini, Socrates and Plato. Books would line the walls of nearly every room, and I would finish reading all. This is an unavailable set of circumstances, but I AM relying on a type of voodoo here.

The man I have spent the last 44 years loving would without question be by my side. My children and their significant others, my parents and siblings, grandchildren, extended family, and true friends would all be a part of this unique and extraordinary day. Each member of the entire clan and all the calabash cousins would find themselves laughing at someone’s comments or antics throughout this time.  All would indulge in deep, hearty laughs that reveal an intense happiness, one which resides beneath the surface reaction to jokes and escapades. (By the way, when I leave this place I want all to celebrate, to laugh.  Those that show are to be in brightly colored clothing.  Maybe a second line parade would be a part of this departure ceremony.)

Music.  Music would be omnipresent.  Music would be in walking surround sound, be everywhere, as if theme music in a movie.  It would automatically change depending on the mood of the moment.  Miles Davis, Louis Armstrong, Ella Fitzgerald, George Harrison, David Koz, and Andrea Bocelli would be represented. B.B. King, Van Morrison, Frank Sinatra and Irma Thomas, their voices would fill the air. Allison Krauss, Ingrid Michelson and of course some Hawaiian music would waft between the leaves of my chosen venue. Johnny Cash, Patsy Kline and Luciano Pavarotti would stream from the rivers. The list of music desired has no end. I will stop trying to run through it all. 

Those that would be so inclined would burst into song and/or “bust a move” when the spirit moved them to let go. I would be very much in that company. It would be a “day” that would saturate the senses.

My hands would hold a manual camera, or two, heavy, sturdy with great presence. My fingers would press the cool shutter release and the lighting would always be correct for whatever effect I would be trying to achieve. The compositions of said photographs would be very much to my liking. (I would be a natural at the art of composition.)

Where to spend this longer than twenty-four hour day?  My initial choice has to be on the Ligurian or Amalfi coasts of Italy, where mountains are visible from the shore of the Mediterranean and cliffs drop into the sea.  To speak Italian fluently, yes that would be a must.  French too. Wait a minute… the islands of Hawaii would have to be an included locale. Maybe in my vision of the perfect day I would move from Italy to Hawai’I as Samantha relocated often in the sitcom Bewitched. Strong floral scents, trade winds, notes from ukuleles, getting dirty hiking to waterfalls, all of this could be experienced.

May I mix this with incredible Italian food, New Orleans’ cuisine and a visit to Firenze’s Uffizi Gallery?  Drop in on Jackson Pollock painting and Degas during the time he lived in New Orleans? Throw in horseback riding along the shore, in Italy or Hawaii. Add playing with puppies and safaris on the African continent.

If it is my one-of-a-kind, magical day, I suppose I can dream as I please.  Sometimes dreams do come true.  Sometimes parts of dreams do. Granted I have pushed an impossible set of circumstances into a day.  Remember, I did add much time to what we call a day. In my day of hocus-pocus, it would not be impossible to the enjoy what is my entire list.

Oh yes, I would want to zip down to Peru and the Andes, Brazil’s Amazon and Patagonia. Namibia and Botswana would take some time also. (In my favorite day fantasy, I would just extend the time allowed, once again. To do this is an odd take on the “one of the three wishes is three more wishes” scenario.) A flight into Bhutan, home of the happiest people on earth, would be part of the finale. I would listen to local traditional music and wear traditional clothing from everywhere I travel. Do you think my entire family and my friends would willingly go for all of this? 

This perfect day has evolved into a selfish bucket list.  I suppose everyone’s perfect day list is for the most part selfish. In my list, all would be joyful, content, and healthy. I would witness and be a part of many hugs and much hand-holding.  No loved one would feel even a short moment of loneliness. Once again, I will reiterate that laughter and MUSIC would fill nearly each moment.

As I wrote the last sentence in the paragraph above, I realized some moments I would want silence from humans and anything they designed. I would hear only the simple, yet still complex, earth-born utterances which put my mind at ease. The surf, bird’s songs ~ doves cooing in the morning, wind through palm fronds and live oak leaves, all of these would be in attendance.

My selfish dream day.  I have been fortunate to have experienced a few entries on my list.  Some I will most likely not, and definitely not with all those I love.  I will keep an open heart and willing mind in any regard.  Who knows?  Maybe in this fantasy of a perfect day(s), I will pick up the violin again. Maybe I will sing outside the privacy of my own home and car. Perhaps everything would be perfect, my imperfectly perfect.

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